Small Calamities

Your Calamities

That's the Way
September 24, 2007 | permalink

I am getting ready to leave the house on Saturday to meet my sister The Star, and there is a knock at the door. It's the super, and he says there is a rattle in the pipes somewhere in my apartment line, and he needs to turn on the water in the kitchen and bathroom to see if it is originating with me. So, I let him in and finish getting ready to go. No problem.

Yeah, right.

I poke my head in the bathroom before I leave, and he is trying, in vain, to turn on the hot water faucet. I have been fighting a losing battle with the faucet to keep it working... the threads have been stripping out. I keep making it work for a while, and it keeps getting worse. (Sure, I could have had him fix it, but I hate to be a bother unless it is absolutely necessary, you know? Or, I am just stubborn.) So, of course, it completely gives up the ghost while the super is there.

He runs downstairs to grab a new faucet handle, and returns in a couple of minutes. He switches it, turns on the water to test it (it worked just fine, no slippage), and turns it back off. Only the water doesn't fully turn off. I am not talking about a drip here, Gentle Readers. This was a steady stream of water. The super then says, and I quote, 'That's no good.'

So he turns off the valve on the wall that should, in theory, shut off all of the hot water in the bathroom. It makes no difference at all to the stream of water pouring from the faucet. 'You have a problem inside, my friend. I fix.'

So, I left, and left him to it. When I came back later, I noticed right away that there was a rusty hacksaw blade on the floor outside the bathroom door. I knew right then that I was in for a treat.

Sure enough, not only were both faucet handles gone, but the spigot had been hacked off, and the resultant hole had the vestige of the pipe in it, surrounded by plumbing putty. It looked kind of like a neck, after the head has been decapitated. At least it wasn't leaking at all. Oh, and there was a note: 'Be careful when using the sink.' Be careful?!? I would have to use pliers to get it to work at all. It was all quite amusing.

So, in theory, it will be finished today. Although this morning the guy downstairs knocked on my door to say that there was water leaking down from my bathroom. Which, since I had no water running at all, is Not a Good Sign. I think there must be a leak in the wall, now. I think my whole bathroom is going to get torn apart this week...