Lay Down Your Weary Tune
February 25, 2008 | permalink
You're going to love this, Gentle Readers.
A few weeks ago, I got a text message from The Old Man. This, in and of itself, is not really anything of note. I get a lot of them from him (mostly after he has had a few too many daiquiris), and they are run of them mill text messages from a tipsy parent. Which probably isn't really all that run of the mill in and of itself, but that's another issue, for another time.
In any case, this one left me floored, mouth open, and incoherent. I present it here in its entirety, because I just don't know how I could possibly do it justice otherwise.
By a series of improbable coincidences a daughter I was unaware of and I have found each other. Her name is [redacted], 33 years old. We have grown very close over the last few months. I am adopting her, we truly love each other.
Let me repeat: this was a text message. My sisters The Rockette and The Star got the same one, as I nearly instantly learned, since there was much talking on the phone between the three of us. It became clear shortly that all of my siblings (wait, scratch that- all of The Old Man's children; I have siblings that are not his) got the same message.
Obviously, this is a large and complex issue, and we will be returning to it several times over the coming weeks, but here are the things that, at first gloss, really blew my mind...
a) Did I mention this news was delivered via text message?b) [redacted] is 33. The Rockette is 32. Which means that Redacted's mother was already pregnant with her when my mother got pregnant with The Rockette.
c) Except for The Rockette, The Star, and myself, none of the other siblings had any problem with the fact that this news was delivered via text message.
d) Um... adopting? At 33? If The Old Man had any assets, I would be worried this was some kind of scam.
So, yeah. Wacky, right? This has been rippling around for a while- as I said, it was weeks ago. And I have lots more to say. But I think I will pause here and let all that sink in a little before I go on.
Posted in Family Matters & The Old Man & WTF!?haiku 164 was the last entry.
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If it makes you feel any better, my mom calls me every time she gets tipsy. Which is fortunately not all that often. She generally calls to plan some detail about a large party I'm not planning to have.
i really can't get over the text message part. or the part where your other siblings didn't find it somehow bothersome to find out they have a new sibling via electronic communication. cray-zee.